Videogame narratives have come a long way in the medium’s short history, although some might say that they haven’t quite gone far enough. Here, we’re going to take a look at some of the weirdest stories in videogame history, and have a good old laugh in the process. Oh, and in case you haven’t figured it out, there may well be some enormous spoilers in the following article, so don’t blame us if a game you’ve been itching to play gets ruined – you have been warned.
Everything about Deadly Premonition is weird. It looks like a game from the last generation, it plays with an undeniable clumsy charm, and its story is a bizarre mash-up of soap opera and horror. Rightly compared to Twin Peaks, the game sees you leading an FBI Agent through a murder investigation. You’ll meet a swathe of bizarre characters, all of them slightly mad, as you try and piece together the mystery. Oh, and you’ll also keep talking to your own alternate personality, who’s called Zack. Mad as a bag of spanners, but well worth picking up.
It’s usually the end of games where things start to go a little bit wonky, and Enslaved is no different. A brilliant third person action adventure, it’s a sci-fi retelling of the Chinese classic, Journey To The West. Towards the end of the game, it transpires that the Slavers, one of the two main villains in the game, are actually kidnapping people in order to plug them into Andy Serkis’ brain, where they can relive happy days before the world was ravaged by war. Enslaved, yes, but enslaved by the memory of green fields and flowers.
The Assassin’s Creed Series
Oh, where to begin? The Assassin’s Creed games are essentially about stabbing people in the olden times, but the mechanics the developers used to get there are frankly ridiculous, and the bigger back story is like listening to the ramblings of a meth-addled tramp who’s just been hit by a bus. If my understanding is correct, two secret groups have been trying to kill each other since the very dawn of history, because of reasons, and now they’re using science to go back in time and find out why.
No one is entirely sure what the story of Pariah actually is. An original Xbox FPS, released in the wake of Halo, huge pieces of background information are left unexplained, leaving you floundering around, trying to figure out what in the name of all hell just happened. Towards the end, it turns out that you’ve been a traitor all along, and you didn’t even know it. Now that’s a ballsy move.
Super Mario Bros.
Some games make sense. Sonic saves his world because he’s fast, and cocky, Alex Kidd variously saves his because he has a giant hand, or is pretending to be a ninja. Spyro is a dragon, nuff said. Mario, on the other hand, is a plumber. Who in their right mind would send a plumber – a vertically challenged, obese plumber with porn star facial hair, mind – to go and save anything, let alone the daughter of a regent. No one, that’s who.